Laws that are needed to be followed in Dissidia
by alexa005
Summary: When both Cosmos and Chaos are sick and tired of their warrior's shenanigans, they decided to make laws in order for them to follow. but what will these laws do to the warriors? Chaos, of course! -inspired by things that are no longer allowed to do fanfics-
1. Cosmos law 1

**Hello! I'm new to this fandom and my knowledge in Final Fantasy is limited (for I played I-VI and tactics advance). This is my first fanfic in this fandom so criticism is welcome!**

 **Disclaimer: Dissidia: Final Fantasy belongs to Square Enix. I only write this story for pure fun.**

 **Second: English is my second lauguage so expect some grammatical errors that you will ecounter thoughout the story.**

* * *

 **Cosmos law 1: By my decree, you are NOT allowed to make helmet jokes when WoL is around. It is already old. Yes Zidane, that means you. - Cosmos**

"Hey guys!" Zidane said approaching his friends Bartz and Squall.

"What is it, Zidane?" Squall asked, not a care of what the genome will say.

"Sheesh, Sqaully you such a pooper." Bartz said to the SeeD, who only growled in reply. He turned his attention to Zidane. "What is it you are going to tell us?"

"Listen, what did WoL do look like with his helmet on?" Zidane asked. Squall only facepalmed, knowing what Zidane is doing.

"What is he look like?" Bartz asked.

"He looks like a bull!" Zidane joke and began to laugh. Bartz and Squall sweatdropped and fear was written in their faces. They only backed a step when they saw a figure behind Zidane. Zidane doesn't know that WoL is behind him.

"Zidane, that joke is already old." WoL said. That statement jumped Zidane in fear.

"He-hey! WoL!" Zidane nevously greeted the newcomer. WoL raised an eyebrow.

"Zidane, for the last time, stop making jokes about my helmet! This is my personal costume!" WoL scolded.

Zidane only hung his head in shame. "Sorry."

"The meeting is about to start at 20 minutes and I expected you to be there." And by that statement, WoL departs.

"What were you saying?" Squall smirked at the embarassed genome.

Bartz only laughed.

* * *

"Any more questions?" WoL said to the rest of the Cosmos Warriors who are gathered in the meeting room.

Zidane raised his hand. "What is it, Zidane?"

"Is your helmet sharp enough to kill Garland?" Zidane playfully asked. For that time, Squall facepalmed again, Bartz and Tidus tried to stop their laughters, Terra covered OK's ears, Cloud wanted to smack Zidane in the head and the rest are jaw gape.

WoL only sighed. "Zidane, I only use MY sword to kill Garland, not my helmet. Please stop making those jokes!"

"You only make him angry, Zidane." Cecil said. "For the name of his sanity, please stop it."

But that didn't stop Zidane to tell more helmet jokes. Every time that WoL is around, he makes jokes. Hell, even they are fighting the Chaos Warriors, he jokes. By the seventh day, WoL snapped. Yes, calm collected Warrior of Light snapped. "That's it! I have enough of his jokes! Time to settle this!"

* * *

"Hey,WoL-" before Zidane could finished, a heavy object was hit to his head, rendering him unconsious. Behind Zidane is a smirking WoL in his throwing position. The heavy object that he thrown to Zidane is a thick book.

Firion aproached him and checked on the genome's unconsious body. "I think we should tell Cosmos to write a law about helmet jokes."

"Agreed." And the two walk off to find Cosmos.

* * *

 **And Chapter one is done! If you have some laws in mind, feel free to suggest!**

 **Laws that I working on:**

 **Chaos law: The Emperor is NOT allowed to boast his beauty in front of his fellow warriors, especially Kuja. Don't whine to me if you are beaten to a pulp. -Chaos.**

 **Cosmos law: For the last time, STOP asking Cecil about his lips. It's irritating.-Cosmos.**

 **Dissidia law: Cloud and Sephiroth are NOT allowed to destroy every place that they fought for everytime they saw each other. We are tired of restoring those places!- Cosmos and Chaos.**

 **As I said earlier, critism is welcome!**


	2. Chaos law 1

**Thanks for reading! I'm happy that someone has appreciate this fic. Here's the next chapter!**

 **Disclaimer: see chap 1**

* * *

 **Chaos law 1: The Emperor is NOT allowed to boasts his beauty to his fellow warriors, especially Kuja. Don't whine to me if you are beaten to a pulp-Chaos**

"Mirror, mirror on the wall. Who is the fairest one of all?" Mateus said to himself, looking in the mirror one last time in a certain morning in Chaos' castle. "Me! I'm the fairest of all!" He waltzed out of his room and smiled.

He only jinxed himself.

* * *

"What in the world is Mateus doing?" CoD asked, she's with Exdeath when they saw Mateus waltz in the halls, whistling a nameless tune.

He approached them. "Good Morning, my fellow warriors. I hope your morning will be greeted to someone as beautiful as me."

The two warriors blinked. They know that the emperor is boasting his beauty, again. "Good luck." They said.

Mateus was confused.

* * *

"If you are bragging to me that you are more beautiful than my brother Cecil, I suggest that you should drop it." Golbez warned when Mateus boasted about his beauty to him.

"Sheesh, your brother looks like a GIRL! Don't you get it?" Before Mateus knew it, Golbez suddenly attacked him with Firaga to the face.

"NOT THE FACE!" Mateus screamed. "Stupid brother complex." He also added.

Somewhere, a certain white haired paladin sneezed.

* * *

Ultimecia only scoffed when Mateus boasted his beauty to her. After all, she is the only one who can stand up to his narcissicm.

* * *

Kefka only laughed at Mateus when he boast about his beauty to him. "Are you insulting me, Clown?"

The clown stopped laughing. "Kuja will beat you if he finds out."

"Kuja will not find out. He's busy fighting his brother." Mateus excused.

* * *

Before Mateus can boast his beauty to them, Jecht and Sephiroth kicked him out of the room. "There is NO way in hell that his narcissism-ness will boast about his face again!" Jecht said annoyed.

"Kuja will kill him." Sephiroth muttered.

Jecht heard him." You sure? You and Kuja are more beautiful than him."

Sephiroth ignored Jecht's comment.

* * *

When Kuja came back after a humilating defeat from Zidane, he heard Mateus boasting his beauty in front of Garland. Kuja, a fabulous fashionista and beauty expert as he is, stormed Mateus and shouted.

" **ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU ARE MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN ME?!** "

Mateus stopped boasting and tuned his head at Kuja. "Oh, Kuja! How are you? Are you talking to the King of Beauty like me?"

Kuja was pissed off, cast Holy at Mateus and beat him to a bloody pulp. Garland only sighed at the sight.

"Guess I going to tell this to Chaos." And Garland left.

* * *

 **End.**

 **As always, criticism is welcome!**


	3. Dissidia law 1

**Thanks for reading! Took me weeks because I'm busy with my OJT so here it goes!**

 **Disclaimer: see chap 1**

* * *

 **Dissidia law 1: Cecil and Golbez are NOT allowed to do the matchmaking to their fellow warriors just because of boredom. If the two of you don't stop doing that, we'll do the following: Cecil, we will force to SHIP you with your BFF Kain (we don't care that you are a married man) and Golbez, we will force you to sleep, no pun intended. -Cosmos & Chaos**

"So, brother, who do you think is the best match for each other?"

Golbez looked at his younger brother with a confused look. They were at a random place in the Lunarian Subterrain in a certain day. "Mind you repeat that, Cecil?"

"I said that who is the best match for each other." Cecil repeated with a smile. "I wonder how we matchmake them, though."

Golbez looked at the list on his brother's hands. The list contained the well drawn chibi faces of both Cosmos and Chaos warriors with their name beside them. On each name are lines that are match to each other's names.

"Well, how we able to match them?" Golbez grinned.

Chaos ensures.

* * *

"So Lightning, how's the scout going?" Firion asked the pink haired warrior.

"No manikins and Chaos warriors on sight." Lightning replied. "Overall, it is clear. We should go back and report this to WoL."

Unknown to the two, the Lunarian brothers hides themselves in the bushes, seeing Firion and Lightning walk together. Golbez summoned his black dragon in secret and said dragon appeared in front of the two. Firion and Lightning's blades drawn and attack the dragon but the dragon's tail wagged at Lightning's feet and lose her balance, causing her to fall onto Firion. The two falls flat together.

"Ow!"

"Sorry, Firion!" Then she noticed that she and Firion are close together. Lightning hastly stood up, blushing.

"It's ok." Firion said, blushing also.

Behind the bushes are Golbez and Cecil, trying to stop their giggles. "There so cute!"

"Not so cute." A voice said behind them and the brothers turned their heads and saw WoL frowning and arms crossed. "Cecil, you supposed to be with Tidus."

Cecil head droops. "Sorry."

"I'll take my leave then." Golbez said and warped out.

* * *

"Terra, are you okay?" Cloud aske Terra when the latter fell down on the cliff.

"I'm okay."

"I'm going down!" Suddenly, Cloud fell down too. Both of them are in the bottom of the cliff.

"I can warp. Hold my shoulder." Moments later, they are in the top.

"Thanks, Terra."

Terra blushed. "You're welcome."

High above the tree is Cecil, almost dropping an atomic f-bomb. "Come back here! You did something that I don't like!" OK's angry voice was heard in the surrondings.

"Shoot! Time to go!" Cecil scurried and leave.

* * *

Golbez didn't bothered to ship Ultimencia and Mateus. They are good together, anyways.

* * *

Before the two of them make a plan to ship Yuna and Vaan, two enormous shadows coveresld their entire being. Golbez and Cecil turned and gulped at the sight of Cosmos and Chaos, arms crossed. "Cecil, WoL told us that you ship your fellow warriors. You should be with Tidus by now!"

"And you, Golbez, you are suspended for shipping your fellow warriors!" Chaos said, grabbing Golbez and warped out.

As for Cecil, Cosmos only pinched his ear and dragged him out.

 **End**

* * *

 **As always, criticism is welcome!**


	4. Dissidia law 2

**Double Chapter! And by the way, this chapter is connected to my other fanfic. Plus, I will include the new characters from the new Dissidia game (and Noctis, since I've got a feeling that he will be included soon), so here it goes!**

 **Disclaimer: See chap 1**

* * *

 **Dissidia law 2: ALL of you, will you stop killing Cloud? Just because he is invited to that tournament doesn't mean that you wanted to join and fight the legendary contenders there. We are having a hard time to defrost you people!- Cosmos and Chaos.**

"WHY CLOUD IS ONLY ONE TO JOIN IN THAT FREAKING SMASH TOURNAMENT?!" Squall complained as he and his fellow warriors sat down in a campfire one night. Lucky for him, the resident chocobo head isn't around.

"Because he's popular? That's make sense." OK said as Squall throws an acorn to his face.

"Guys, Cloud said that it is not easy to enter to the tournament." Tifa said, trying to defend Cloud. "But-"

"I want to join too!" Lightning also complained. The others agreed with her.

WoL stands up, unsheathing his sword and raise it up. "Let's storm the mansion and force Cloud to let us join in the tournament!"

The others cheered. Tifa only groaned and facepalmed.

* * *

"Seph, you are so moody. What's wrong?" Golbez asked as he saw Sephiroth sulking at a corner.

"My puppet entered THAT tournament." Sephiroth answered.

"What tournament?"

"Smash Tournament."

Upon hearing the word 'smash', all of the other Chaos warriors pop up one by one.

"I want to join that tournament!"- Jecht.

"Why Cloud is the only one to join?"- complaining Kuja.

"Settle down, everyone!" Garland said. "We will storm the mansion tomorrow!"

"And force Cloud to let us join to the tournament!"- Mateus.

Everyone cheered.

* * *

 **-Next day, Smash Mansion-**

The Cosmos warriors stands at the gate of the mansion. "So this is Smash mansion." Firion looked in awe. "It's too grand."

Then, WoL saw the Chaos warriors. "What are you doing here, Garland?" WoL asked angrily.

"The same goal as you." Garland answered. "To join the Smash tournament."

"You will not!"

"Try me!"

Then, Bartz saw Cloud wandering the fields of the mansion and that's where Cloud saw the warriors. "It's Cloud!"

"Oh shit!" Was Cloud's exclaimed.

The others saw him. "Get him!" WoL commanded.

And everyone chased after the chocobo head. Said chocobo head ran for his life.

" **ROY! WHERE ARE YOU?!** " Cloud pleaded.

Tifa only gasped at what she saw. "I'll call both Cosmos and Chaos!" She dished out her phone and dialed the Gods.

* * *

 **-Several hours later-**

"You're Cosmos and Chaos, right?" A giant right hand greeted the two Gods, Tifa didn't join the riot for a reason.

"Yes, we are." Cosmos answered.

"The name's Master Hand. And are these your warriors?" He said, gesturing the warriors who are turned into a block of ice.

"Yes, that's our warriors." Chaos answered.

"What happened to them?" Cosmos asked the Hand.

"Let's say that they chased Cloud and hit him in random directions." MH explained. "And one of your warriors hits Roy here so he transfromed into an ice dragon and turned them into a block of ice."

"Who's Roy?" Chaos asked.

MH used his thumb to point at a direction and the two Gods saw a very scared Cloud being chased by an angry red-haired swordsman who is swinging his fiery sword around.

"Well, we will not to make that guy angry." Cosmos commented. Chaos agreed.

"I think Cloud said something offensive to him. Don't pissed Roy off." Tifa advised.

 **End.**

* * *

 **If you are confuse, read the 'laws that are needed to be followed in smash mansion'. The chapter is Smash law 10.**

 **As always, criticism is welcome!**


	5. Cosmos law 2

**Sorry for the slow update! I was swallowed by RL and I can't write for those few days! Plus, I was playing Breath of Fire 1 & 2, so I almost forgot to update.**

 **Anyways, I must apologized for the updates and I must compensate it. Enjoy!**

 **Disclaimer: see chap 1**

* * *

 **Cosmos law 2: Whoever idiot dresses me as a girl, I swear that I will torture you and send you to the Netherworld. Last time you did this to me, every male mistaken me for a girl and it was embarassing. - Cloud Strife (with Cosmos' permission)**

Everyone wondered if Cloud himself is a girl, he will be the envy of the female race. Even females from their group like Yuna or Terra will be no match for his beauty. Hell, even them won't recognize him in a dress.

So, two certain idiots found Cloud one night, cast a Sleep spell on him and dressed him in a very beautiful pink dress completed with a long blond wig and some accessories that will complete his getup. They replaced his Buster Sword with a Sexy Colongne and leave him there.

* * *

"Hey, miss, can I have your name?" A random person asked Cloud one morning when he was tasked to buy foods from the town. Cloud only stared at the guy.

"Not interested." Cloud replied. "I'm not a girl."

"You ARE a girl, Miss!" The man said. "Look at youself."

Cloud looked at a random store window and shocked that he was dressed up as a girl from head to toe. He ran away immediately.

* * *

"Hey, Laguna!" Vaan said to his companion, pointing at a running Cloud. "I wonder what's wrong with her."

"Go ahead and help her."

"What? Why me?"

Laguna touched his legs. "I have leg cramps when it comes to pretty girls, you know."

Vaan sweatdropped, then proceed to help Cloud. "Are you okay, Miss?"

"Vaan," Cloud snarled. "I'm okay."

"Wow!" Vaan exclaimed. "How do you know my name?"

"Because it's me, Cloud."

"Cloud?" Then Vaan looked at him from head to toe. "No way! I won't recognized you immediately in your getup! Is this some sort of a hobby?"

"No."

"Are you gay?"

"No. And I'm NOT interested in guys."

"Crossdresser?"

"Vaan, I swear that I will send you to the Netherworld if you dont stop." Cloud threatened him.

"Whoa! Easy." Vaan reassured him. "Then why are you dressed up like that?"

Cloud think. "I swear that someone used a Sleep spell on me."

"Who?"

Cloud grinned. "I know who."

* * *

 **-Cosmos Castle-**

"We're so sorry!" Bartz and Zidane apologized to the angry Cloud. Both of them are hanging upside down in a tree.

Tifa was with Cloud. "Cloud, I don't think this is right."

"No, they deserved it, Tifa." Cloud deadpans. "They pull a prank on me."

"And it was funny!" Bartz said.

"No. It's not."

The other Cosmos warriors only shook their heads in dissapointment. No one helped those two, anyway.

 **End**

* * *

 **As always, criticism is welcome!**


	6. Dissidia law 3

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy!**

 **Disclaimer: see chap 1**

* * *

 **Dissidia law 3: Whoever idiot summoned THESE tonberries would be feed to the Behemoth. Last time it happened, all of us are hiding in the barrel and some of the warriors are traumatized because of that!- Cosmos and Chaos.**

 **P. S: Blame the clown! - All of Cosmos and Chaos Warriors except Kefka.**

"MOMMMMYYYYYYYY!" OK shrieked as he, Tidus, and Firion are running for their lives as these frog like creatures with a hood, a lamp in one hand and a knife in the other chasing them.

"I thought they are inhabited in the caves!" Tidus shouted as he dodged a knife attack from a random tonberry.

"Moogles? That's okay, they're harmless. Cactuars? Slight. But Tonberries? They are NIGHTMARE INCARNATE!" Firion shouted at the top of his lungs. Suddenly, the tonberries cast Holy on them.

"Shit!"

"Let's get out of here!"

"This happens before, right?" OK said as he was hit by said spell.

"OF COURSE IT IS! BLAME THE CLOWN!"

* * *

"Where's Terra?" Tifa asked as she looked for the half-esper while fending off the invading Tonberries.

"She was hiding in the barrel." Yuna answered as she summoned Bahamut to oblirate the tonberries. "Last time this happened, she was almost killed by them."

A explosion later, and the two girls saw some tonberries flew away in the sky. "I think it was Lightning."

"Did the tonberries pissed her off?"

"I think so."

"I feel sorry for them."

* * *

"First, those annoying scarfies and now this tonberries?!" Cloud cursed as he swings his Buster Sword at the tonberries. He only visits the castle recently.

"Did this incident happened there?" Squall asked as he attacks the tonberries.

"Worse." Cloud sighed. "Smash mansion sometimes pulls this kind of prank. Mostly from Crazy Hand."

Squall gave the chocobo head a WTF look. "Seriously?" Cloud nodded as a reply.

Suddenly, they hear a shriek from Bartz, Vaan and Zidane. "Did those three attack the tonberries?" Cecil asked.

"Yup." Kain said as he was ready to jump.

"Amen to them." Laguna said as he was ready to shoot.

* * *

 **-Cosmos and Chaos meeting room-**

"Listen here, Cosmos. It wasn't me who did this!" Chaos said as he slammed the table. Surronds the round table are Cosmos, WoL and Garland. "These tonberries also attacked my castle too!"

"What Lord Chaos said is true, Lady Cosmos." Garland agreed. "We will show you the evidence, if you insist." At the wave of his hand, the table shows the chaos occured at Chaos Castle. The warriors are also fending off the creatures while some of them (like Mateus) are only running for their lives.

Cosmos, after seeing the evidence, asked. "Are you sure?"

"Of course!"

"We said the truth!"

WoL noticed in the evidence that Chaos' resident clown wasn't in the chaos. "Where's Kefka? I haven't seen him there."

"Now that you noticed." Garland said, as he put a hand on his chin. "We haven't seen him since the tonberries arrived. This happened before too."

Realization drew in three of them. "Then that means-"

"Yes. We know who to blame."

* * *

 **-Behemoth Cave-**

"I swear I won't do it again!" Kefka pleaded as he was hang upside down in a tree. Below him is an opening to the Behemoth cave.

The two Gods, the warriors and an angry Terra in her esper form only deathglared at him.

"Next time if this happens again, Cosmos and I will send you to Cloud's quarter ice dragon friend who joined in Smash to either freeze you with his powers or fry you with his sword." Chaos threatened the clown, who is only shivered in fear at the threat.

"Luckily, we able to summon Odin to clean this mess up." Cosmos sighed. "This won't happen again. Understand?"

Everyone nodded and leave the wailing clown alone. Let the Behemoth handle him.

What about the tonberries? Ask Odin himself!

 **End**

* * *

 **If you are confuse to this, read 'Laws that are needed to be followed in Smash Mansion'.**

 **You can still suggest your laws here! Don't be shy! XD**

 **As always, criticism is welcome**


	7. Dissidia law 4

**I'm not dead yet! Feasibility has been swallowed me for these past months at the same time I didn't update this fic. So to compensate this, I will post the new chapter.**

 **Reference to a certain tactical strategy game (if you are a fan of that, you know what I mean.) and also voice actor jokes! XD**

 **Disclaimer: see chap 1. Fire Emblem belongs to Nintendo.**

* * *

 **Dissidia law 4: Making jokes about having a 'barbeque party at Belhara' or roasting me with Fire (or its upgrade magic) is NOT funny. Just because my Japanese voice actor is the same as a certain blue-haired cavalier doesn't mean that you apply that joke on me. Yes Cloud, that means you. – Sephiroth.**

 **P.S: Return that tome 'Valflame' to the owner immediately. That is not funny also and you don't know how to use it, puppet.**

Sword clashes at each other as their surrounding began to crumble. Cloud dodged an attack from his arch nemesis and went to a safer place.

Sephiroth is in front of him. "Give up."

"Never!" Cloud gritted his teeth in anger.

"You are a puppet. Surrender to me and this will be over."

"Gay!"

"I'm not."

"Your words imply that you are molesting me!"

"Really? Show me some proof."

"I'll give you some. Climhazzard!"

"Not bad." Sephiroth said as receive some damage. "Seems you're improving."

"Well Seph, I have a surprise attack for you!" Cloud mocked at him.

"And what's that, Cloud?" Sephiroth said, crossing his arms.

Cloud took a red book from his inventory, flipped its page and chanted some sort of spell.

"You know puppet, that book only applies to Mateus' world-"

"Valflame!"

"Wait what?"

* * *

Bartz, Zidane and Vaan laughed their asses off.

"Wow, Cloud! You barbeque your archenemy with-" Zidane laughed as he pointed at the Valflame tome. "That!"

"Cloud, where in the world did you get that book?" Lightning asked, aghast.

"Let's say, I 'borrowed' it from another realm. Since that the owner hasn't use it yet, I decide to take it with me."

"That's stealing! And if you need to steal something, ask Zidane!" Vaan said, wiping his tears from laughter.

"Well, it's only temporary so I will use it on Sephiroth." Cloud grinned. "That way, he will have the taste of his own medicine."

* * *

 **-At a certain realm-**

" **MY VALFLAME!** " A certain red haired mage wailed at the entire castle, making all the inhabitants wince and cringed at his wailing .

* * *

Back at the fight between Seph and Cloud. They met the next day and as usual, they fight again.

"Do you think that attack will beat me,? You're wrong." Seph said as he parried Cloud's attacks.

"Yeah Seph, but you missed one thing."

"What?"

"Valflame!"

"Cloud, stop attacking me with that-!"

* * *

Kefka and Mateus gave Sephiroth dirty looks.

"Whoever person owns that book, I feel sorry for him." Golbez sighed. "That book doesn't belong to any of our worlds."

"If I face that puppet again and use that tome on me I swear that I'll kill him." Sephiroth said as he was soaked in the hot spring to cleanse all the soot that he received from Cloud.

* * *

When Sephiroth and Cloud face for the third time. Seph sheathed his Masamune and talked to Cloud. "You know, I have an Ice Materia on my inventory and have 'Heartless Angel' in my sleeve so." He sprouts his one wing and flies away out of Cloud's range.

Cloud took five steps within Sephiroth's range. "By the way, Sephiroth."

"Uh oh."

"Yes. Valflame!"

Both sides are now glared at the infamous rivalry.

* * *

"So, you think that someone is stealing your arch enemy's tome, correct?" Cosmos asked to a certain blue haired cavalier wearing white. He was with a red haired cavalier wearing blue.

"Well, he thought I was the one who steal his Valflame tome." The blue haired guy said. "He almost roasts me with his Elfire if it weren't for Eliwood here."

"And my son's suspicion is that none from our realm steals that tome because it applies to the Fala descendants." Eliwood said. "So his suggestion is that the thief came from another realm."

"So that's why you're here?" Cosmos asked. The two nodded in reply.

"Did anyone carry a red tome with him or her lately?"

* * *

"Sephiroth! Time to meet your maker!" Cloud unsheathes his Buster Sword.

"Finally! No more Valflame for me!" Seph said as he unsheathes his Masamune. "Now I can fight you fair and square."

"Yeah Seph, but do you think that spell is gone?"

Sephiroth realize what Cloud said. "Drat!"

"Val-"

" **ARVIS, YOU DASTARD!** " A voice was wailing in the air, causing Cloud to halt the spell mid-air, which is followed by, "Sigurd, calm down! It's just only your PTSD!"

"Oops!" Cloud exclaimed. He knew the latter's voice even from far away.

"Well, look we have here." Sephiroth said as he looks at the source. "It's your smash buddy's father."

Eliwood looked at Cloud holding the Valflame, put his hands in his waist and glared at him. "Cloud Strife, return that tome to us, now!" He demanded.

"But-"

" **NOW!** " He bellowed.

"Okay, okay." Cloud stepped down and gave the tome to Eliwood.

"Are you applying the 'barbeque Sigurd' joke on your enemy?" Eliwood asked, raising his eyebrow in doubt as he receives the Valflame tome.

" **ELIWOOD!** " Sigurd wailed, comically crying.

"Why that joke is applied on me anyways?" Seph asked himself.

"Voice actor jokes." Cloud deadpanned.

"Well, now that our mission is complete." Eliwood smiled as he opens the portal and dragged Sigurd in it. "We're leaving."

"Say hi to Roy for me!" Cloud said.

"I'll do that!" And by that they disappeared.

"Valflame? Really?" Seph said. "Let's continue fighting without any distractions!"

"Okay!"

"And Cloud?"

"What?!"

"Stop the barbeque jokes. It's not funny!"

 **End**

* * *

 **And that's it!**

 **As always, criticism is welcome!**


End file.
